On Freezing Time
I’ve been waxing on and on lately about Nell growing up but it’s not without reason. Facebook Archive has been the main culprit with the daily baby photos of our sweet girl… that remind me that I already almost can’t remember her as a baby. I know it’s ((very important)) science as it’s probably the only way mom’s can wrap their mind around having another but it’s jarring to think that just six months ago I was reveling in her little wrist rolls and drinking in her baby smell and now she eats tacos for dinner and dances to our Alexa.
I’m sure it’s partly that we simply don’t know right now if we’ll be able to grow our family and while I have come as close to terms with that as I can, it still sends a wave of regret through me whenever I think about it that I didn’t just sit and stare at our perfect little person every day all day for the first year of her life. Everyone says “it goes so fast, cherish every minute” when you have a baby and it’s almost as annoying as everyone telling you’ll never sleep again because the time that people tell you that is also the time that you’re partially wishing time away because your baby is wailing with colic and refusing to sleep and you just want to know it gets better. I wouldn’t change anything, one because I can’t and two because I know there is so much magic ahead but lately I find myself rocking her off to sleep just to buy myself a few more minutes of feeling the rhythm of her sweet little breathing on my shoulder.
It’s funny to me that I have an iPhone full of thousands of pictures and videos of every day of her life yet I still can’t recall the tangible feeling of holding her or brushing her fuzzy head of hair or her tiny fingers wrapped around mine.
My Instagram friend Vana and I were comparing discount codes and return shipping costs for a set of Pottery Barn Roman Shades before I had even checked out her profile and realized she creates these beautiful custom silhouettes of even the tiniest babes (fun fact: her background is in architecture!). I teared up when I saw them - it’s so beautifully classic how a simple black silhouette can capture the tiny nuances that make our children themselves… including those unique little noses and sprouts of curly hair.
Similar to my Yearly Co. stack, I could see one of her special locket pieces being passed down through generations, perhaps with Nell even putting her own children on the other half. Vana reached out about working together and we selected the medium locket with the heavyweight chain to balance the ball chain necklace I wear every day. Based on my other necklace I decided on a 24” chain - but full disclosure, I ended up having it shortened to 22” as I found the 24” had the locket hitting just beneath the neckline of most of my tops.
Vana sent me three versions of Nell’s silhouette and I put them in front of C, who immediately chose the exact same one that I did! It’s remarkable how a classic silhouette can capture the little nuances that make our babies our own.
A few weeks later my locket arrived and I teared up when I opened it. It’s so beautiful. That little pony and tiny baby pout will always bring me back to these early days of motherhood. I find myself playing with it during the day (good thing it’s 14k gold or it’d be green already :)) and it always makes me think of Nell. I’m so thankful for the midday pick me up!
Vana has generously offered to give away a $100 gift card to her shop! Simply follow both @MegHall and @LePapierStudio on instagram and ‘like’ my giveaway post to enter and we will select a winner on Friday!
all photos courtesy of Amy Patrice Photo
